"And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us...For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions."
These are some of the hardest words of Jesus for us to accept as Christians. They are difficult because it not only means forgiving our family and friends for minor offenses such as lying, breaking promises, or calling us names, it also means forgiving those we consider our enemies for offenses we consider outrageous and terribly sinful. It means that we no longer let their offense bother us no matter how wrong their action or behavior. It means considering themselves reconciled to us, even when it seems unfair. This seems especially difficult when we are asked if we must forgive Hitler or Bin Laden for their misdeeds. Let me assure you that forgiveness does not mean forgetting, or, if someone's offense is a crime, letting them off Scott free (who is Scott and why is he free anyways). If someone is killing people or molesting children, they need to go to prison for obvious reasons. Forgiveness is letting go of the hold another person's offense has on you. Lewis Smedes puts it this way, “You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well.”
What we learn from the above words of Jesus is that in order to receive forgiveness, we must forgive the sins of others. He is very clear, if we do not forgive, we will not be forgiven. So what does forgiveness look like?
I am not going to address forgiveness for major crimes or criminals in this post because I do not think that is the most difficult area of forgiveness for Christians. I think the most difficult area of forgiveness for Christians is forgiving what we perceive to be sin, even minor sin, in other people. Premarital sex is no crime, but how difficult is it for us to forgive such an offense. If the Church finds out the youth pastor has been engaging in premarital sex with his fiance, he gets relieved of duty. Even though the plan is to for the couple to get married, and even when the youth pastor is repentant, we cannot forgive even though God does.
If we find out one of the ladies in our bible study has had an abortion, it is all over, she will be run out of that bible study so fast no one will know what happened. She may be feeling devastated about the abortion. She may be repentant every day and forgiven by God. But she is immediately and forever condemned by us.
If two women walk into the Church holding hands, we stare viciously at them and, like a scene from Forest Gump, tell them "this seat is taken," even though no one has sat in that pew for twenty years. (For those wondering, I continue in the idea that homosexuality is not a sin, and will continue to lead people to my post Is Homosexuality a Sin? as long as I am alive. But the majority of Christians will continue to think of homosexuality as a sin, and so I am speaking to them from their world-view). These women are forgiven of their sins by God, but not by the body of Christ.
We are told in Scripture that the gate to heaven is narrow. I do not think this is because of the vast amount of sinners there are in the world. I think it is because of the vast amount of grudges people hold. I think it is because even Christians are not willing to forgive people of their sins unless they are their own. I think a large amount of Christians will not enter into the kingdom of heaven because they are not willing to forgive people for what they perceive to be sin (not everything Christians condemn as "sin" are really sins in the Bible. Many churches consider long hair on women to be a sin, while other churches consider short hair on women to be a sin. Some churches consider smoking to be a sin. Some consider drinking alcohol to be a sin. None of these things are in fact sins in the Bible). If the Church continues in its lack of forgiveness, that gate will be much narrower than we ever thought.
Jesus commands us to be forgiving. This means that we will not let it bother us if a Christian is struggling with sin. Show me a Christian who is not struggling with sin. And if you come forward telling me about how above reproach your pastor is, my guess is he or she would be relieved of duty if his/her sins were found out. No Christian is free from sin...that is unless we practice forgiveness.
You see, Jesus died on the cross, he paid it all because our debt was too great to pay. The only way to sever our debt was to provide a way for that debt to be forgiven of us, instead of paid by us. And if God can forgive us of our sin, shouldn't our appreciation be shown by forgiving others of their sins. To illustrate this, Jesus tells this parable in response to a question from Peter in Matthew 18:
Then Peter came and said to Him, "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?"
Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.
"For this reason the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his slaves.
"When he had begun to settle them, one who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him.
"But since he did not have the means to repay, his lord commanded him to be sold, along with his wife and children and all that he had, and repayment to be made.
"So the slave fell to the ground and prostrated himself before him, saying, 'Have patience with me and I will repay you everything.'
"And the lord of that slave felt compassion and released him and forgave him the debt.
"But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii; and he seized him and began to choke him, saying, 'Pay back what you owe.'
"So his fellow slave fell to the ground and began to plead with him, saying, 'Have patience with me and I will repay you.'
"But he was unwilling and went and threw him in prison until he should pay back what was owed.
"So when his fellow slaves saw what had happened, they were deeply grieved and came and reported to their lord all that had happened.
"Then summoning him, his lord said to him, 'You wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me.
'Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?'
And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him.
My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart."
It is obvious in this parable that the lord of the servant represents God. The amount of time it would have taken the servant to work in order to pay back the debt would have been 130,000 years, according to David Jeremiah in Prayer, The Great Adventure. In other words, this debt was impossible for him to pay off. And yet the lord forgave it. Because of his great generosity, it was expected that the servant would have shown this same kind of generosity. But instead he threw a fellow servant in prison for a debt that would have taken a few months of work to pay back. The moral of this story is that the sin God forgives in us, is greater than any sin we will ever have to forgive in another. God asks that we show the same generosity for lesser debt that he showed us for an impossible debt to pay back.
What this means for us today is that when we see someone entering our church who we perceive to be a sinner (whether their behavior is actually sin or not) we must treat them as forgiven members of the body of Christ, just like we are. In other words, God forgives and forgets their sin, counting them innocent and guiltless; therefore we should as well. Whether a person is gay or straight, has had an abortion or not, has engaged in premarital sex or not, they are no longer considered sinners before God; they should therefore no longer be condemned by us.
Finally, this means that those of us who experience harsh judgment and criticism from the Church, as difficult as it may be, must learn to forgive also. Part of the healing for those of you in the LGBT community and for those who have had abortions or are part of other communities that Christians judge and condemn, is to let go of the hurt caused by forgiving those who persecute us. As always, know that Jesus loves you and I love you.
Please enjoy the video below which was made by Intersections International as part of a movement they are calling Believe Out Loud. I think you will like it.
Blessings,
-Brandon
